Terr Cacilia here- For today’s post I wanted to share some personal thoughts, and a bit more about my time with SKORCH. This articles purpose is to help inspire others to reach for their dreams, and is in honor of the little girl who thought she could, and did.
I’ve always been a non-conventional over achiever. I knew from an early age that my path was meant to be different from what was deemed “normal” by society. This non-conventional approach of life continued as I grew following me through middle & high school, and often felt as if it were plaguing me. I suffered for a long time with severe depression, and self-hate. Really the only reason I bothered to stay in high school was because I was able to attend vocational school for Fashion Design & Merchandising. I began vocational school in my junior year of high school, and discovered my true calling. From that time on I hit the ground running.
In 2013 almost a month after graduating high school I began contributing as the Junior Editor of SKORCH Magazine. Fast forward to present day where I am now Senior Editor, and for the most part fit the role of your average 22-year-old college student. Sure I come complete with a cute boyfriend, and a bad Netflix habit, but when you have a NYFW event after your trigonometry class you are instantly reminded how different you are.
Sometimes I wonder to myself how I have gotten where I am, and what comes next? Sure with success comes sacrifice (I mostly sacrifice sleep) but if it’s really meant to be sacrificed for the better- it really never feels that way. Even though I am younger than most I wanted to share the lessons I have learned thus far on my journey. Never would I want to see someone not go after their dreams, and if I can help in any way I will.
-Not everyone is going to like you:
As a people pleaser this has been one of the hardest concepts for me to grasp. Some people are just not going to like you no matter what, so you might as well learn to accept it. You do you, and the right people will follow.
-Community not Competition.
I say “Community not Competition” often as a way to describe my own website (theplussideparty.com) mission. I almost feel like a hypocrite saying it because as an Aries I am naturally competitive. Redirecting that competitive spirit in bringing people together has been one of the best changes I have made, and is needed in the fashion industry.
-Do your best- then do better:
This advice is the over achiever in me 110%. Whenever I have a project to work on I develop it through a four-part process:
3- A “Final copy”.
4-Return to the “final copy”, and bring it up to a new level.
When working on projects each time I return to my previous work I treat it as if it’s the only think I’ll ever work on.
-Be Kind, but don’t expect kindness in return:
An ongoing joke my Mom has with me is that I’m “friends with everybody”. I go out into the world with the goal of having a positive interaction with at least one person. In the fashion industry on occasion people have been not so kind, and in some cases plain rude. This has not stopped me from being kind to them, but I certainly no longer expect kindness in return.
-Accept that you are going to be told “No”:
“No” is a word you will hear a lot in life, and it can feel like bricks falling in around you. Early on I was told “No” almost all the time, and it still happens to this day, however…
-Turn No into Yes:
Take the energy you had for your original idea, and redirect it! Use the bricks of the “no”, and use them to build your own solution! Don’t let this energy go to waste- it is an opportunity to challenge your problem solving skills, and find a new route. Many of my “No” experiences have gone on to become much bigger “Yes’s”. I would have never expected some of the results I have gotten if it had gone my way the first time.
-Find a great mentor:
Mentor or Mentors. I have a group of people who each hold skills that I admire, and want to develop some way in myself. Through mentorships I have had some of my most significant internal growth. These people for me are teachers, designers, writers, public figures, artist, and so on. I owe so much to those who take the time out of their busy lives to help me achieve.
This is the hardest lesson I’ve had to learn. Putting it simply- not everything is meant to be born from instant gratification, and the best things are born out of patience. If it’s meant to be it’ll have its time- just pace yourself, and see.
Thank you all so much, and I hope that this article may aid you in reaching for your own dreams.